Why Buchou Has A Word Limit
by Aki Kaede
Summary: [Oneshot] The Seigaku regulars get together and rack their brains over the most elusive question of their buchou...on why he has a word limit! Slight RyoSaku[Tezuka's birthday fic!]


Author's notes: This is a PoT crack fic!

I haven't had time to write my fics lately but I just had to just for Tezuka-buchou! This is my birthday gift to him. Happy birthday Tezuka-buchou!

Sorry to all of you who are waiting for the update of ** Affections Across Time**! I really do not have the time to write the next chapter! I promise I will post the next chapter up when I have the chance to write! It'll be the first thing on my to-do list when I have the time!

I had no time to check grammar and stuff like that so things may turn out to be a little messy so please bear with me!

Please enjoy this fic and review!

Happy birthday Tezuka!

Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis or any of its characters.

* * *

**Why Buchou Has A Word Limit **

"Ah! Ah! He's here, he's here!" Eiji chirped excitedly.

"Eiji." Oishi said, closing the door of the club room after he entered. He scanned the room. Inui was as usual out with his notebook. Ryoma was leaning against a wall and yawning away while Fuji was smiling as always. "What is the meeting about? Where's Tezuka?" he asked.

Eiji giggled. "We are holding the meeting _precisely_ because Tezuka isn't here!"

"Huh?" Oishi was still confused.

A ray of light reflected off Inui's glasses as she pushed them up against his nose. "There's a 99 percent chance that you will be confused Oishi. But the fact that I am here, means that there is data worth collecting."

"Data? What data?" Oishi asked.

"Oishi-senpai!" Momoshiro's light-hearted voice rose. "Of course its data on buchou!"

"Tezuka? What data would you get when he isn't here?" Oishi was puzzled.

Eiji laughed. "Oishi hasn't it been bothering you all these three years?"

"What has been bothering me these three years?" Oishi, up till now, still had no idea what was going on, or rather, what the rest of the regulars were planning.

This time it was Fuji who spoke up. "Oishi." He smiled. "Aren't you concerned why Tezuka speaks so little? Put it in other words, why he has a word limit?"

"Word limit?" Oishi thought for a while before he realised what they were trying to do. "What are you guys doing wasting time here! You should be practicing so you can beat Tezuka! And Tezuka doesn't have a word limit…" he stopped for a while. "He…doesn't have a word limit, erm…does he?" he said undecidedly.

"See! Even you are unsure about that!" Eiji bounced around excitedly. "Don't you want to know why?"

"But…but…" Oishi looked around him uneasily.

"Oishi-senpai! Don't be so square!" Momoshiro, Eiji's partner in crime, popped in. "You want to know, _don't you_?"

"Minna, I…I think Oishi is right…we shouldn't do this, behind Tezuka's back…" Kawamura let out. "I think that we should…" before he could finish, Fuji shoved a racket into his hand.

"BURNING!" Kawamura shouted, wildly waving his racket around.

"GREAT! Come on Tezuka!" Kawamura pointed his racket at an imaginary Tezuka. "I'll find out why you speak so little and open your mouth! BURNING!"

"Ta…Taka-san!" Momoshiro was flustered. "Calm down! Buchou might hear us!"

Fuji coolly removed the racket from Kawamura and he was back to normal. "Seems like nobody objects to this meeting. So shall we begin." He smiled to everybody. As in, he smiled to everybody. Oishi gave up his intentions of protesting.

"Let me go first!" Momoshiro started enthusiastically. "I think that buchou speaks so little is because…he has bad breath!" he proclaimed proudly.

"Fshuu!" Kaidoh let out. "That's one of the stupidest answers I have ever heard. Can't you think of something more original?"

"What did you say Mamushi!" Momoshiro got up from his seat and had his fist clenched in front of him. He glared at Kaidoh. "My idea is not stupid! I bet you can't think of anything else!"

"Of course I can think of something else! Something less stupid than your answer!" Kaidoh retorted.

"Like what?" Momoshiro raised his voice.

"Buchou speaks so little because!" Kaidoh began but stopped halfway. "Because, because…" he seemed to be thinking so an answer. "Because he has bad breath!"

Silence reigned in the room as everyone stared at Kaidoh.

"Mamushi! Didn't you say that my answer was stupid? Why did you copy me!" Momoshiro shouted.

"I didn't copy you! You did! I had that answer in the first place!" Kaidoh screamed back.

"I say you copied me!" Momoshiro proclaimed.

"I did not! You were to one!" Kaidoh shoted back.

"What did you say!" Momoshiro was fuming. "Want to fight?"

"I'm not scared of you!" Kaidoh returned. Soon, a fight was breaking out between the two second-years as always. Eiji and Oishi tried to stop them. But it was really what happened next which stopped their fight.

"This is boring. The seniors are so childish." Ryoma said in a really bored tone. His hands were behind his head and it rested on the wall behind him, his cat-like eyes closed. "I rather go practice tennis. See you guys." Ryoma began to stand up.

"Fshuu!" Kaidoh glared at Ryoma fiercely.

"Ochibi! You can't go!" Eiji sprang up.

"Echizen! How dare you say I'm childish!" Momoshiro shoved his fist in front of the first year.

"Mada mada da ne." Ryoma said and made a move to go.

"Wait Ochibi! You can't go!" This time an evil smirk had formed across Eiji's mouth and his eyes were glittering. "Wait, who was it I saw hugging Sakuno-chan the other day…" he pretended to wonder.

Momoshiro recovered at the prospect of blackmailing his junior. "Yeah yeah! I thought the guy looked a bit like somebody I know…"

Inui cut in. "According to my data, the person did drape a Seigaku regular's jacket…"

"Wa…wait!" Ryoma immediately let out, his face tinted a little red. "We were supposed to talk about buchou here right? I think…" he quickly tried to take the focus away from him.

Eiji, Momoshiro and Inui sniggered at this. They knew Ryoma was just trying to cover up.

"Buchou doesn't speak much because he is strong. The strong do not need to say how great they are." Ryoma said, before muttering in an inaudible voice. "_Except somebody who talks crap everything and only knows how to read porn magazines…_"

"That's possible." Inui said. "However we cannot forget that there are people like Atobe who are strong as well as flashy."

"Hoi hoi! It's Kikumaru-sama's turn!" Eiji stood up. "I know why Tezuka has a word limit. It's because he has tooth decay!"

Everyone went silent for the second time of the day. Eiji glanced around excitedly to see the reactions of his teammates. "Right? Right?" he asked hyperactively.

"Ei…Eiji!" Oishi spoke. "Tezuka doesn't take sweet stuff! And wasn't it you the one who had tooth decay…" he added.

"Oh…" Eiji looked downcast. "I thought Tezuka might have the same problem as me. How can he don't take sweet stuff! They are the best in the world!" he whined.

"I guess it's time for me to present my analysis." Inui declared as everyone turned to stare at him.

"The reason why Tezuka speaks so little is because…" Inui gave a dramatic pause. "He is hiding gold bars in his mouth."

This time, the Seigaku regulars all stared blankly at Inui. If it was a joke, it was worse than Rokkaku's Amane. But wait, it couldn't be counted as a joke. It was just pure…pure…er…stupidity?

"I haven't finished." Inui pushed his glasses up. "Probability of that, 0."

"Inui!" Eiji protested. "Then why did you say that!"

"I wanted to see what everyone's reaction would be like when they heard a joke worse than Amane's puns. Ii data…" Inui began to scribble in his notebook.

* * *

"ACHOO!"

"Davide, are you all right?" Kurobane asked Amane.

"All right, my English test had all right. Pfff!" Amane made one of his puns again. However it didn't take long for Kurobane to kick him.

* * *

"Hey you guys! Do you think its right discussing about Tezuka like that? You are inviting trouble you know?" Oishi said worriedly.

"You worry too much Oishi." Fuji smiled.

"But Fuji, if Tezuka overhears this conversation…" Oishi was unappeased.

"Tezuka has a meeting with a teacher and wouldn't be here so early." Inui said.

"Don't think about it Oishi." Fuji smiled. "By the way, I _know _the _exact_ reason why Tezuka has a word limit."

"Fuji-senpai! You know why?" Momoshiro asked excitedly. All the other regulars had their attention on Fuji, eyes shining. Even the skeptical Oishi was interested.

"Of course." Fuji said, the smile still etched on his face. "It is because Tezuka…"

"Tezuka…" "Buchou…" everyone said.

"Saves his energy…" Fuji continued.

"Saves his energy…" The rest of the regulars echoed.

At this juncture, the door of the club room slammed open, revealing a not-very-amused Tezuka Kunimitsu. Everyone stared at him, shocked and mouths gaping. Everyone except Fuji, who was still smiling away.

No one could beat Tezuka's glare. Most of them shuddered, awaiting the ultimate punishment to be passed upon them. Nervous gulps could be heard. Tezuka took a deep breath.

"EVERYONE! 500 LAPS AROUND THE COURT! NOW!" Tezuka commanded.

"To say this sentence." Fuji finished, smiling. This invited a ferocious glare from Tezuka and shocked stares from the rest of his teammates.

"FUJI! EXTRA 100 LAPS! EVERYONE, GET RUNNING NOW!"

"Hai!" Everyone answered in unison, afraid of what would happen if Tezuka's commands weren't obeyed. Even though everyone was still scared of their buchou, they held a certain respect for the tensai Fuji Shuusuke. No one dared to go up against Tezuka like that, except him.

"Well, well, well…" Fuji laughed slightly while running. "I wonder how many percent of that is true…"

Everyone looked at Fuji and shuddered. The tennis prodigy is definitely not one to be trifled with…

* * *

Author's notes: How was it? I hope Tezuka likes his present. :)

Did you all like the little appearance by Davide and Kurobane? I thought it would be pretty interesting to let them have a random cameo in this fic. The idea just popped into my head!

Anyway, please read and review!


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